Greg and I have to reaslise that running bars won’t last forever. The reality is that bars come in and out of fashion and we need to plan for the future.
Then Chris posted this video on his Facebook page and now we have a plan for how we can stay employed in the future. We are now taking applications to join our stunt troupe.
I’m pleased to see the one-way street issue getting some press. As a central city resident and business operator my opinion is that the one-way streets are a silly out-of-date notion that we now have a great chance to fix.
If the central city is nothing more than a means to get from Linwood to Riccarton as fast as possible then it is dead. If it is an exciting, engaging place to live, work and operate a business then it has a chance of finding its new identity. There’s a perfectly good ring road. Use that to get around the city.
Sure, traffic engineers are opposed to the idea because their goal is to move traffic as efficiently as possible. But if you let traffic engineers design your city then you’re going to have a bloody boring city.
People are harping on that it will slow down their commute. Really I don’t care if it takes someone five more minutes to get to work if the flip-side is that these dead old city streets can find some life again.
All the research points to the fact that one way streets are bad for the buildings that exist on them.
Frankly, what I think is missing in transport planning is chaos. The most organized places are always the most boring. Get rid of all the lights and make them roundabouts I say. Make the city a slow place, with blurred boundaries, where pedestrians and bicycles have right-of-way and let the automobile find its place within this structure.
We have a chance to fix all the things that were crap about the old city and this is one example of an issue that we shouldn’t defer. We should all shout our opinions so that we can end up with an exciting central city that reflects us and not a bunch of boring-as-hell engineers.
Well, I’m hoping this is the end of all the problems we have had with our site. That blimmin Happy Hacker has caused mayhem on our site which has made it near-impossible to access.
But thanks to the always-excellent folks at Deflux, we may just be back on track. This means more regular posting for you, the fans of this hilarious blog.
We have been working our way through the place and coming up with strategies to combat the cold. So we now have warmth and shelter. If you’re feeling cold we now have hot water bottles, blankets, heaters galore, mulled wine and cider. If you’re still cold after that then you must be a reptile and we suggest laying in the sun to get your body temperature up.
In good news I now have a column in the Press every Thursday which means I get to expand the readership of my ranting. I will post a link this week.
Also, our first birthday is coming up shortly. Stay tuned for an update on the party we will be having. This comes with happiness that we have survived a year, and sadness, that we have less than a year left on this site. But onward and upward and hopefully once we move, the next place will be as well received as it has been here on Victoria Street.
We’re changing to winter hours now so will be open Wednesday – Sunday from 3pm till late.
In true Moore Family fashion, we’re going to be having a great party down at the bar on Sunday for St Patrick’s Day. Come on down to Smash Palace and enjoy Magners Cider on tap, Jameson’s Whiskey and loads of Irish music.
Unfortunately, due to Johnny, Tim and Mikey all being away, the band consisting of just Pam and Jock won’t be making an appearance this year, however, we have plenty of music to keep us all entertained.
Also, with Johnny and Tim being away and Rosie being heavily pregnant – we don’t have enough people to make up an 8 hand this year but I’m sure that won’t stop us from showing off and dancing at some stage during the evening.
Johnny is away on his honeymoon for the next three weeks so I’m in charge of the bar.
We had Johnny and Juliet’s amazing wedding last weekend. Juliet was the most beautiful bride, wearing her Grandmothers gown and Johnny scrubbed up well for the event.
200 people put on their glad rags and celebrated their civil union in Abberley Park and were then piped down the road by a local bag piper, to the Scottish Society Hall.
The day was incredible and went without a hitch. Highlights of the night were Greg and Tim’s massive party popper, which has been described as being like Tommy’s conception – 2 seconds of fun for a huge amount of work and the Wedding Cheese Cake – so much cheese.
Here’s a photo of the stunning couple.
The hilarious Smash Palace blog has received its first complaint since the “GBM Poo in a Bar” posting (which received a raft of complaints). Our good fried the Parliamentary Commissioner for the Environment claims that when she is logging on, the latest witty posting is not necessarily at the top of her screen. This means that amongst the jumble of postings, she has to work to find the latest and when looking back for old postings, they are not necessarily there.
I have had the tech-boys look through the site and they have been unable to find a problem. This now has me stumped.
So I thought I’d check with the dozen-or-so of you that read the blog if you have had any problems (that means you Jasper and Louise). If you could let me know of any problems you have experienced, I would be most grateful. Then we can get this site running smoothly so that you can all get your quad-weekly dose of offbeat commentary.
Let me know if you’ve had any problems: johnny [at] goodbyebluemonday.co.nz
Sorry it has been a while since I last posted. I have been so busy selling piss that I haven’t had time to entertain the internet masses with witty commentary.
It seems there are more than two people that read this hilarious blog. I now believe readership to be upwards of 10 people which is very exciting to this aspiring writer. People are always coming in saying “I wish you’d post more,” which is hard because I struggle to think up content based around Smash Palace every day. I’m sure nobody is interested in: “Today I filled the holes in the ground with a bag of asphalt. Now there are less holes for girls in heels to fall into…”
So here is the plan. I am going to extend this blog’s parameters outside of Smash Palace. I will write about anything that interests me and we will see how that goes. I would like to comment on all the great things that are going on in this city as we move into the rebuild phase. I would also like to post videos of chimpanzees riding bicycles and that type of thing. Hopefully this means more regular posting and you, the reader, will get more entertainment.
Thanks for your support everybody.